Desire vs. Fear

Doing something because you want to, not because you fear.

Recently I was traveling around my country and I met an interesting battle that occurs within me a lot of times. There are times when I want to do something, but then I figure out that I have a fear for the results and I do not do it. But life is too short to fear and fear simply cuts us off from our ties with the Universe. Imagine that you hear the whisper of the Universe telling you that this person is your soul mate and you wish to talk to him, but you stop because you fear that it might not be true and you end up not knowing which one is it. I vote, that it probably was your/mine soul mate, but now we will know neither if it is true or not. And what worst might happen if it is not your soul mate? You learn a lesson. Isn't that great?! So I offer you to do this: if you want to do something, but decide not to do it because you feel a fear for something, forget the fear! And just do it. Life is a lesson in itself. Let us swim in it with joy and exploration.

Love,
Rokas Leonavicius

a thought in rhyme

I fear what may never happen,
I fear what i can not see,
I fear what i can't control,
I fear what may never be,

I hold my fear with two hands
to never let it go
in hope that times will vanquish it
or at the very least let it erode

but time so far is not a friend
it passes with little thought
so muched i have missed because of fear
i'm missing what i havn't got

time for regrets is long passed
time to hold my power close
time to ignore the fear and hold my own
take advantanges from the life i chose

Let the idiots know they're idiots

I am a living contradiction, I believe in harmony but am yet to find the inner harmony within myself, I hate lying, but lie to so many by not telling them what I think, the truth.. It causes me anger, but I hate being angry. I have listened to the whining of others, and agreed when i didn't agree for the sake of peace for far to long, it wears you down and tires you out, eventually you want to take it out of the world and ask yourself how are people so stupid? They can't see the inner workings of thier actions. For the most part I shut my mouth 'cause it's none of my business, I then get angry watching the people involved not saying what they think, letting this person go with the mis-conception that everyone is okay with the path they have chosen. Their patterns continue through life believing they're a saint, poeple just care to much to expose their demons and stand up to emotional blackmail. But why do i care? it doesn't affect me, i have my family with a mother i stood upto my whole life and have finally come to the conclusion that she will never except the person she really is, she will never except fault. I have a brother that has simular personality traits as my mother, he is always right, but will except fault and excepts who he is, my dad is my closest in the family we understand each other and value each others opinions, and will except the others opinions and take them on board. He is who i have the most honest relationship with. But never do i let any one of my family members or friends make a stupid action without my imput, and sometimes my opinion may not be validated, but if they are, it at least gives another point of view instead of all the yes men that people surround themselves with, to make them feel better about the choice they made. So again why can't people just be honest? let the idiots know they're idiots, tell them what you think, voice your opinions, speak up, people need to learn its not okay to be ignorant. Its not okay to be an idiot.

Breathing to Balance Energy

In this fast-paced world it is no wonder we sometimes feel fatigued long before the day is done. It is important that we keep our energy levels up in order to maintain optimal health. Other times we get so wound up it is difficult to fall asleep. Here are some techniques to help you to keep your energy levels in balance.

Breathing and Visualization for Energy Restoration

This energy restoration exercise is quite simple. It can be done anywhere and only takes about two and one-half minutes to complete. While performing this exercise keep your jaws closed and each hand clenched lightly into a fist. With each inhale think to yourself that each breath is bringing a surge of energy and power that you are storing within you. Feel this happening.


1. Sit erect but relaxed(not tense) or stand with your weight balanced evenly on both feet.

2. Take a deep breath in through your nose while counting slowly and evenly to five.

3. In a relaxed state, slowly let the air out of your lungs through your nose to a count of ten.

4. Repeat this ten times consecutively.

Within 15-20 minutes after completing this exercise you will notice a distinct rise in your energy level. This increase should last for several hours. You may do this exercise 4-5 times daily, as needed. By practicing it at least once each day you will gradually build up your energy supply. This will strengthen your system, giving you greater resistance to infection and disease.

If you are a person who visualizes well, you will find this next exercise to be very effective and refreshing.

1. Sit erect yet relaxed with your feet touching and your hands clasped loosely in your lap.

2. In your mind, visualize the sun as a great flaming orb of pure energy.

3.Now, mentally lift your consciousness away from your body and go "in spirit" to the sun. Enter into its aura and proceed into the body of the sun, uniting with it. Have no fear. You are a child of the sun/light and you are simply returning to your rightful home. Let the sun's tremendous warm, loving energy flow through your entire being. Feel it strengthening and invigorating you.

4. After one minute return to your body and go on with your daily tasks.

You will notice immediate refreshment and stimulation from this exercise. After a few hours, look back on the way the exercise benefited you. You should notice that you have been able to accomplish more work with much less fatigue than you would normally experience.

If you feel you are having a "bad day" and are irritable, angry or depressed, use the following exercise to counterbalance your negativity.

1. Sit in a straight-backed chair located in a place where no one will disturb you. Take three deep breaths to relax yourself.

2. Separate your feet, keeping them flat on the floor. Sit erect, keeping the spine straight. Allow your hands to rest loosely in your lap or on your knees without touching each other. Touch the thumb, index and middle finger of each hand together in triangle fashion.

3. Take a deep breath. Hold it for a count of seven, then release it.

4. Wait a few seconds and repeat step # 3.

5. Do this seven times, then get up and go on about your day.

While our bodies need to maintain an energetic state, that state needs to be in balance. Having too much positive energy can feel just as uncomfortable as having too much negative energy. To counterbalance excess positive energy, begin as in the previous exercise.

1. Sit erect and take three deep breaths to relax.

2. This time, your feet should be flat on the floor, but touching each other. Hands should be held in front of the body at chest level, thumb touching thumb and each finger touching the tip of the corresponding finger on the other hand. Close your eyes and take a deep breath.

3. Slowly exhale all the air out of your lungs. When all the air has been exhaled, count slowly to five.

4. Now breathe in and out slowly and regularly for 5-6 breaths until you are relaxed again.

5. Repeat steps 3 and 4 five times. Then, return to your normal breathing pattern and put the exercise out of your mind.

This exercise, if done at the first sign of cold symptoms, and repeated once hourly for three hours will decrease the severity of the cold and quite possibly eliminate it entirely.

The good news is that, should you use the wrong exercise, you can just follow it with the other to restore balance. Very soon you will come to know and understand yourself and become aware of which exercise will be helpful for which types of problems and emotions.

Using Colors to Aid Healing

Color Healing

Colors affect our moods and our physical bodies. Mankind has known this for a very long time. Think of the expressions we use. When we are down we say we are in a "blue" mood. We say we feel "green" with envy or "red" with rage. Today I want to share a bit about colors and how they can benefit us emotionally and physically. Though there are many colors, today we will be working with the colors in the rainbow, beginning with red.

Emotionally, red renews enthusiasm, stimulates you and gives you the willpower to carry on. It may also put you in the mood for romance. If you are procrastinating, putting off doing something you dread, wearing red will give you the extra push you need to get going. Red will pick you up when you are feeling down or lack energy. Red is a good color to wear when counseling someone who is facing death. It allows you to help them to see death as the doorway to a new adventure.

Physically, red eliminates the negative and unwanted energies like a cleansing fire. It induces the release of adrenaline into the bloodstream. (Here is it's association with anger.) It eases stiff muscles, especially those in the legs and feet. Red is an especially useful color to wear if you catch colds easily or if you get chilled. It frees the blood-flow and detoxifies.

In the emotional realm, orange governs our "gut feelings". It breaks down barriers subtly and gently. You will find orange helpful in cases of depression, divorce, accidents, rape and mental breakdown. For those experiencing grief and loss orange will help to bring them through the shock. Orange gives you the strength to remove past blockages so you can move forward.

In the physical, orange is healing to the kidneys, lower back, lower intestines, the abdomen and also governs the adrenal glands. Those in need of orange are often unable to absorb the physical and emotional benefits of their lives. Orange will help to ease Bronchitis and Asthma. It will help those with mental disorders and epilepsy. Rheumatism, broken bones and torn ligaments heal faster when aided by orange. It can be applied directly to the muscles and the limbs in physiotherapy.

Yellow is an excellent color to use to combat depression. It is useful to clear away mental cobwebs and negative thinking. Yellow will bring the things you need to look at to the surface and will get you talking, ultimately bringing joy and laughter back into your life. It boosts self-esteem and helps you to release fears and phobias. Yellow decreases desire to be critical. It is also said that yellow increases memory, persuasive abilities and charm.


The solar plexus, pancreas, gall bladder, liver, spleen, stomach/digestive system, skin and nervous system are all affected in a positive way by yellow. A cleansing color, it rids the body of toxins. Yellow can also be used to clear congestion and relieve constipation. It stimulates the lymphatic system, eases hot flashes and helps those with menstral difficulties. It is useful in treating skin rashes and abrasions. In addition to all of this, it offers relief to those suffering from diabetes, rheumatism and anorexia.

If you have issues you need to resolve, green will take you into the past and bring those issues to the surface for you. Then it continues to help by bringing insight that helps to clear up the problem. Green stabilizes, restoring balance and easing the mind. Used in times of relationship difficulties it will cool and calm the emotions, decreasing anxiety. Green is known to be a nerve tonic. Wearing green will also help you to bring things into focus, allowing you to make wise decisions.

Green will aid in the healing of the thymus gland, shoulders, chest, heart and lower lungs. It is a good color to wear for treating shock and fatigue. Green quells nausea and soothes headaches. Those who suffer from clausterphobia should wear green. It will also help to restore stability to anything malignant, calming overstimulated, out-of-control cells. It also helps in healing pituitary gland problems. A good detoxifier, green is effective in healing liver complaints. It also relieves hay fever and head colds.

Blue calms, cools and allows brings rest to the mind and body. It heightens tranquility and patience as it lowers negativity and stress. It helps you combat the fear of going forward, and allays fears in general. It also helps you to understand that you do not get what you do not ask for. Those who need to relax should wear blue or take some time to lay back and gaze at the sky.

The thyroid gland, parathyroid gland, throat, lungs, upper arms and the base of the skull are affected positively by blue. Blue is useful for treating sore throats, ear problems, speech and vocal problems and childrens ailments such as teething. In the elderly, it is useful in treating incontinence. It is a comfort to the terminally ill and is helpful in reducing inflammations and fevers.

Indigo is the color of knowing. It reveals the root of your emotional problems and increases stability, rational thought and actions. The color of spiritual opening, it prepares you for psychic and spiritual experiences. Indigo cleanses and clears away addictive emotional ties. It reveals hidden fears and helps to heal painful memories. Indigo decreases impulsiveness. This is a good color for those suffering from any type of abuse or addiction issues.

Physically, indigo is connected to the skeletal structure, especially the spine. It also relates to the lower brain, the pituitary gland, the eyes and the sinuses. Known as the most powerful painkiller in the spectrum, indigo is also an excellent purifier. It can clear up bacteria and environmental pollutants and toxins. Indigo lowers high blood pressure and can be used to treat an overactive thyroid. Migraines, sciatica, inflammations, eczema and respiratory problems all respond to indigo.It is good for kidney problems, sinus problems and insomnia. It helps with controlling diarrhea as well. Tumors, growths, etc. can be dispersed with indigo.

Emotionally, violet brings relief and improvement to those suffering from any type of mental illness. In regression work violet is useful to acknowledge your inner child or your inner child from past lives so past issues can be resolved. Violet is a bridge to the higher consciousness and also aids those who wish to improve their psychic abilities. It increases spiritual awareness.

Violet represents the crown chakra and influences the brain, pineal gland and the scalp. This is a powerful color. It has been found that when using violet light in healing, it should not be shown onto the face, but should instead be applied to the back of the head. Violet should be used sparingly. Considered a "heavy" color, an overload of violet can be depressing.The antidote for violet overload is gold.

Violet light has been found to be useful in curing newborns of jaundice. Violet is also useful in treating infertility and menstral pain. It can help with neuralgia pain, inflamed nerves, and can also be used to treat eye complaints. It activates the pineal gland and relaxes muscles, including the heart. Violet helps head related problems including headaches, frazzled nerves, scalp conditions, shingles, concussions and all brain-related problems.

There are many ways to use colors to bring healing. You can wear it, use it in your decor, use visualization techniques, etc. Chromotherapy (using colored lights) is a very effective way to heal using color. I would like to close with some information to help you to use Chromotherapy to heal.

Blue and red colors are seen as the two extremes with yellow representing the midpoint. A professional will analyze the patient, examining them to ascertain which color he/she lacks. The deficiency is determined by observing the color of the eyeballs, nails, urine and excrement. In cases of the lack of red the eyes and nails will be bluish, and the urine and excrement white or bluish. If there is a deficiency of the blue color, the eyes and nails will be reddish and urine and excrement yellowish or red.

If you wish to try using colored light to heal yourself, here are a few tips you may find helpful. To begin, you should lie down or sit on a chair with the lamp directed towards you. You should limit exposure time to ten minutes per session. If a treatment is overdone you will become agitated and uncomfortable. If this happens, flood yourself with green light for a few minutes. This will neutralize, dilute and clear the previous application of color. Keep in mind that certain colors have certain limitations. Never apply red if you have a heart condition. As previously mentioned, never apply violet light to the face. Apply it only to the back of the head. Treat conditions that affect the whole body such as colds and flu by flooding the entire body with light. Treat specific areas by pinpointing and focusing the color on the affected area only.

The effect of various colors on the body and their healing qualities are as follows:

Red:
Red stimulates arterial blood and brings warmth to cool extremities. Used as a general tonic, it is very valuable in the treatment of diseases like low blood pressure, rheumatism, paralysis, anemia and advanced cases of tuberculosis.

Orange:
Orange is beneficial in the treatment of hernia and appendicitis, kidney and gallstones. It is also used to stimulate the milk producing action of breasts after childbirth.

Yellow:
Yellow is a laxative and diuretic. It stimulates the brain, the liver and the spleen. It is also effective in the treatment of diabetes, indigestion, kidney and liver disorders, constipation, eye and throat infections, syphilis and impotence.

Green:
Green is considered a harmonious color. It is a mild sedative. It is useful in the treatment of nervous conditions, hay fever, ulcers, flu, malaria, colds, sexual disorders and cancer. It preserves and strengthens eyesight. It is also helpful in the treatment of inflammatory conditions.

Blue:
Cool, soothing and calming, blue alleviates pain, reduces bleeding and heals burns. It is beneficial in the treatment of dysentery, colic, asthma, respiratory disorders, high blood pressure and skin abrasions.

Indigo:
Indigo combines the blood-warming red and the cooling antiseptic blue. It is a wonderful stimulant without being an irritant. It is beneficial in the treatment of advanced stages of constipation, hydrocle, leucorrhoea, many disorders of the stomach and womb, cataract, migraine and skin disorders. It exerts a soothing effect on the eyes, ears and the nervous system.

Violet:
Violet is beneficial in the treatment of nervous and emotional disturbances, arthritis, acute cases of consumption and insomnia.

Have no expectations

The more you expect, the more you desire. The more you desire, the more you long for. The more you long for the more you want it. If perhaps nothing will happen, then these things will lead to more disappointment.

So expect nothing and you will have no disappointment.

Do not demand of others for what you can do yourself

Sometime in your life you would "relegate" responsibilities to others so that you do not have to do it. That is not relegating that is shirking responsibilities. If you can do it yourself with nno fuss why not do it and be done with it.

Give responsibilities to others only because you feel you have nothing to bring to the table or they can do it better than you can. If they can achieve it but won't don't make demand for them to do it either or they will just feel pressured and leave you alone.

If someone make demand on you when you do not have to do it, do you not feel as pressured. So when giving responsibilities to others do it with a light heart and no expectations so that you will not be hurt by it nor other feel pressured by it.

Falling toward the sky

Falling toward the sky
An angel spread its wings
It takes it harp out and began to sing
"Let tell only truth and say no more lies
So that all the people may began to smile"
But the people do not take heed
And so the lies takes its seed
Thus the angel continues its path in to the sky
Fluttering its golden wing
It continue to sing
"Let there be peace on Earth
And heal all harm and hurts"
But the people did not see the awe
And merely continue with their wars
So the angel shrug and continues to fall in to the sky.

Open your eyes, heart and mind, and perhaps a miracle you will see

True to one self

Do you ever feel like no one really knows who you are, not that you hide it or pretend to be someone your not, although we are all guilty of that even if only ocassionally .. its more so about editing the person you are on a level so people think they can understand you, 'cause that makes them feel comfortable. Most people are lucky enough to have friends that they can let your hair down with and truly be themselves, but you still can't let them into your head, to let them know what you are truly feeling maybe that you have such dark thoughts, that you refuse to burden them with that, or are even embarrassed to feel that way, or you have trust issues with the people in your life, so you feel anytime you open up to someone, it will some day be used against you. I have these feeling, for anothe reason, i have been through allot and relied allot on the friends and family around me, i want to be strong in myself and not need the help, and i don't want them to think i need help, i don't want to need the help. .. I am a liar.. i am not giving people me, i am giving them the me that they can handle..

Alone in the Dark

I was making my way through the darkness when I saw a light
I then choose to chase it and try to grasp it will all my might
But the light flicker and flitter and flys from my hand
Living me again alone in this darken land.
For quite a while time seems to have passed by
And then all of a sudden the light came back in front of my eyes
But it has been so long that my eyes have adjusted
That right now I think I prefer the darkness.

-Metha Metharom

This is a poem I wrote a long time ago about finding my own light and not needing anyone else to traverse my own darkness.

The recipie to achieving greatness...

Loneliness

The following is a poem I found while trying to search for an appropriate quote for this image. You can find some of the author's other works by visiting http://www.poetry.com/Publications/display.asp?ID=P0002523&BN=700&PN=1


Lend Me a Shoulder to Cry On
By Nina B. Doughty

Lend me a shoulder to cry on
When life is dark and drear
I need your strength to rely on
I need your listening ear
Fate isn't alwys too gentle
And nobody seems to care
Let me borrow your shoulder to cry on
When I'm drowning in despair.

Lightening your work load - a message on stress

Always respect your limitations. Acknowledge when things are getting too much that you can't handle it, or if they are not pushing you to the best of your ability. Having too much stress is not healthy, but having too little doesn't help you grow. Make sure you find that balance in your life, and always strive to maintain that balance.

Listening to others

Have your own opinion by all means but without opposition in belief or thoughts we can not strengthen our ideals or thoughts.

Knowledge and wisdom comes from what we learn, so to do others gain from the same source. Each and everyone of us have different views due to the different life we live.

Though we can not live their life, by listening to them we can gain a glimpse of what they went through, by doing so we gain understanding. Understanding of people in general, understanding of knowledge, and beliefs, understanding of who they are, and by reasoning by who we are.

So listen well to others, though they do not have the same view thus wisdom as we do. We could gain a better understanding of our own.

Evaluating yourself

It is quite popular and common to evaluate yourself during the end of year. Because the end of the year means a new period will come upon us and we can then set goals to improve or learn new things.

But I ask why do it only on that day, why not do this more often. So that we continuously grow in ourself, our beliefs, and our determination. Evaluating yourself has the effect of presenting to you flaws and perfection you see within yourself and your actions, it also present us with goals of what to do next with our life. So instead of gaining wisdom once per year which is very limiting, why not do it more often and you will grow continuously faster and evolve your mind.

Challenging yourself

When we overcome a challenge we grow in our strength and determination, as well as in term of wisdom and knowledge.

So when life exist without challenge we stagnate and sometime regress due to unused gifts and abilities.

Challenge yourself once in a while, to do new things, to achieve new goals and perhaps we can stay on par with who we are and even better yet improve ourselves even more.

emotional well being - recent revelations cont..

Jealosy ultimately is not worth it, what is it really? A sick feeling at the bottom of your stomach that makes you angry, it makes you hate. And you waste so much time doing it. Time that could be better spent saving to buy that house instead of wishing you were renting it. If you can look at someone in the face and say congratulation, good for you, instead of being jealous it gives you the power, and whatever reaction they’re trying to get out of you will be wasted. With that brings happiness

All of a sudden you realise you have reached the next maturity level in your life without being modest of course.

So you come back some what, to start this story again from a more positive perspective, when you realize what you failed to realize or at the very least failed to notice. What you thought you wanted at this point in time, you don’t really want, you still ultimately want, what you originally wanted and it has taken this five thousand odd words to realize this, the things you thought you wanted were more so, out of spite or jealousy, and what you thought you wanted, didn’t come from the place in you, it should have come from. You still have your priorities but there is no reason you can’t have them and still have things for yourself, really you can’t give your best to others with out doing the best for yourself, there will be sacrifices along the way, if you’re willing to make these sacrifices and still be happy about it, then you know you are making a move in the right direction.

bitch book part 2 - the mother inlaw

You are old enough to have learnt from your mistakes and since you have made allot of mistakes you’d think you would act like your age, stop running into to things blindly. You have more to think about than yourself and I think that has been your problem. You put you, first ahead of your kids and your priorities. At the moment you are babying someone that needs to learn life, instead of being given everything on a platter. You push push push eventually you’ll push them to far, and you’ll be back where you started, if not worse because you’ve sacrificed allot for nothing. Have you ever thought your pushing, pushes people into something they don't therefor you only think thats what they want or feel and no one ever truley feels that way about you. Start realising whatever happened in the past is the past, you only have two daughters, and they are your family. As the mother it is your position to forgive and keep the family together and much of your personality reminds me of a immature teenager. "oh she did this to me" "i'm not talking to you" "omg he likes me" "he hasn't rung me tonight"...

You are all about hate, and revenge and bitterness. The spite you showed towards the break up of your daughters marriage was disgusting, you pretend to be so lovely, its only mildly disguising your black soul. To think that the break up of your relationship with her revolved around jealousy, and then to say you are happy she was hurt she deserved “pay back”, harbouring feelings of resentment creates holes that you will never be able to fill. And then to try and pollute others minds with your prejeduce garbage is just offensive. You can have your one sided argument for the rest of your life cause I am not biting.

You are obsessed with idea of love with out truly being able to commit to it. I don’t think you will ever fully be able to embrace love because you have never truly felt it to other men or your family. You think it’s your right to be loved not a privelidge.

Taking time for quiet reflection...